How Not To Ruin a Tomato

I haven't had a tomato sandwich yet this summer. Today is overcast l so it won't be today as tomato sandwiches can only be enjoyed when the sun is out and the heat bordering on oppressive. The first hot days of summer grow the want for a tomato sandwich but they are also needed to grow the tomato itself which is not ready yet. When the swelter comes back around and weighs the day languid, then it is time for a tomato sandwich.

There are many widely accepted ways to ruin a tomato and a great number of recipes to tell you how. These techniques can be worthwhile the other 10 months of the year when all that is available is the idea of a tomato, not an actual tomato with taste. However, in summer, nothing is more irksome and less useful than step by step breakdown on how to enjoy the moment just as it is.

How not to ruin a tomato

No cold tomatoes

The only acceptable form of cold tomato is gazpacho. Gazpacho is great, cold tomatoes are not. If you keep your tomatoes in the fridge, please hang up. Same goes for ketchup. My mother hates cold ketchup which is completely understandable because she's a woman of refined taste.

No bad bread

I am not referring here to quality but rather variety. Rye bread is unacceptable. Generic whole wheat is utterly wimpy. Pumpernickel, honestly don't you dare. As for artisanal options, they are just fucking it up with fancy. It's White bread. Toasted.

No Lite Mayonnaise 

Mayo is fine in all full fat forms Homemade, Hellman's, Sir Kensington's, Duke's --you do you. What can I say, people are particular about their mayonnaise, man. If you prefer mayo and butter or mayo and olive oil, you sound like good company.

Don't bury the plot Cheese, lettuce, onion or anything else other than tomato, white bread, and mayonnaise and you’re making a sandwich with tomato, not a tomato sandwich. The sophistication of the tomato sandwich, like with most, is found in its simplicity.

Salt, from the sea. Preferably maldon. Pepper, freshly ground. Course.

I always have two-- one because I'm hungry, the other to savor. Potato chips are an acceptable side. Salty ones.

-Taylor

UPDATE: The sun came out.